The Path of Expectations

I keep finding myself caught up on the path of expectations. Expectations of how to act, and what to say, and what to study, and how I’m supposed to live my life. Expectations that are the proven path, maybe, but not necessarily the path that makes the most sense for me.

I’m struggling to make decisions that make sense to me, not decisions that appear to make sense to people who don’t really know my life. I’m working on understanding that the reality is more important then the appearance of normalcy. I’m working on realizing that the choices I make are only a reflection on my situation, and not on who I am as a person.

So maybe it’s not the end of the world if I drop chemistry, if that gives me more time to go to physical therapy and make sure I can walk like a real person again. Maybe I’m horrible at math, but good at writing. Maybe I’ll take more pictures, and focus on creating fun things that make me happy.

Maybe I’m not going to be the superstar student, or the sports hero, or the girl who everyone knows, but I don’t think any of that will matter if I can find the things I love and the things that make me happy.

I’m not quite sure what those things are yet. But I’m trying.